Curious..Totally unrelated to training

[Pam]

I just need to ask, how or why did you pick the name or get the name "fish" Fish? Just curious, you know how women are.

[MrFish]

Here is the true story of how I got to be MrFish.

Once upon a time, not so very long ago, N was a member of the Board of Directors of our State Education association.

N took me as her guest to the annual meeting of that Union, a weekend affair at a coastal resort.

The first event on the first evening was, of course, cocktails and dinner.

We arrive for cocktails. I look into the bar. Everybody has a drink and everybody is mingling. I see the obligatory name tag on jackets and blouses. On the table at the entrance N finds her name tag in a plastic pin-on sheath. There are a number of name tags labeled “guest” . We each take a tag.

Nancy retires to the powder room and while waiting for her, I wander into the dining room.

At each place setting I find three cards: Meat, Vegetarian, and Fish.

Understand that this is an association of teachers and that they can give new meaning to pennywise. They have used the same paper and printer format for the name tags and the meal cards.

I take the “Guest” card out of the plastic sheath, grab take one of the "Fish" cards, slide it into the sheath, and pin it on my lapel.

Back in the bar I walk over to a group and am greeted.

"Well, hello" one of them says to me, "I don't think we've met."

"No, I'm with N."

"And what is your name, Mr ... ?"

At this point I display my name tag for all to see.

"Fish", I say.

"And where do you teach, Mr. Fish?"

"Oh, I'm not a teacher, I'm in seasonal sales."

"Seasonal sales?? What exactly are seasonal sales?"

"Well, as you know, demand for certain products is seasonal. For example, in the fall you've got Thanksgiving turkeys, in the winter you've got Christmas trees, and so on. (N appears at the fringe of the group) So depending on the season or on the holiday, I market items people want only at those times of the year. (N looks very puzzled)

"Oh, my," one of the listeners says, "I never considered that. It must be very interesting."

"Very," I say, "and challenging. To succeed in my business I have to be very careful about inventory control." (N is completely baffled)

"Really, how so?"

"Well, for example, I try to make sure that the chicks I don't sell at Easter are ready to be roasters for the 4th of July picnics."

N chokes on her drink and flees back to the lady's room.

They really bought it. I carried it on almost all evening, until N finally gave me up.

Anyhow, that's how I became MrFish.

[fish]

Pam,

Gotta love it. You must have a naughthy word filter on the site.

I wrote a word for drinks - coc(k)tails - and it automatically cleaned it up to thingytails.

Almost as good as my "swing indian club" search.

Keep the faith,

fish

[Pam]

And here I thought you'd say something like "Oh I like to fish." Funny story, so lawyers do have a sense of humor huh? Sounds like something I'd do...only not sure I'd be as creative as you were.

Fish, I dont have the word filter, it came with one. You should see the words they have in it. I know I lead a sheltered life, and was not the promiscuous type, but they have some words there that I have never heard of. I had asked Jack about getting rid of the list but not sure if I "can". I dont want to lose this board, I'm sick of moving! I had figured out what you meant when it came up "thingy" tail.

By the way, I was just kidding about the sense of humor comment. Anymore good stories?

[fish]

good stories ? I dunno, kiddo. I can only tell what happens at work. Here's an example. Again, a true story.

Courthouse follies:

Justice Delayed is Justice Denied,
or,
hell hath no fury ...

I'm standing in the courthouse, waiting to get to the assistant District Attorney (ADA) on an unrelated case while ...

The ADA is explaining to the Complaining Witness (CW), the wife in a domestic assault, that the State is going to agree to reschedule the case for trial.

CW is furious.

CW "You can't do that. I want to talk to the Judge. I want the trial today."

ADA "We got a Motion to Continue from his Lawyer. The Motion says that the defendant is having chemo-therapy today and can't be here. We going to agree to reschedule for the middle of next month. And even if we don't agree, any Judge is going to grant a motion like that."

CW "I don't believe the Judge will grant his motion. I want to tell the Judge that that's too long a time to wait"

ADA "Why"

CW "Because he'll be dead by then."