Last week

[Pam]

We were dealing with the suicide of one of Tanners friends. Very sad. Brings up all sorts of emotions for all of us. Tanner is determined to be there for his little brother, unfortunately he can relate to the loss. He told me he always hated how everyone seemed to forget about us 3 weeks after the funeral. Ryan's friends came over but Tanner really wanted his older cousins. There was lots of talk of spending time with him but never any follow through, that was hard on Tanner.

Anyway it's been rather quiet around here as we all reflect on what how different are lives are since losing Ryan and how hard it is to come to terms with the fact that nothing ever again will be the same.

[Smoke]

Tanner will not be the man he is turning into without the experiences he has had..tough though they are.

[Pam]

Yeah, sat in a parking lot and had a long talk about everything. He is struggling with his faith. He will work through it though. He just needs to come to terms with the fact that there are just a lot of questions we won't have answers to until we are with Ryan, that can be a tough pill to swallow.